But now they've found that the medication also removes women's facial hair--at a juicy price. The drug dealers say they're working out a deal to allocate some for sleeping sickness victims.

Just doing their job--In France some 4,000 hemophiliacs were among those given infusions with HIV-tainted blood. French officials had barred blood-screening procedures developed abroad because they were waiting for a test developed by French capitalists. Families of profits-before-life victims filed charges against the responsible politicians. The politicians walked. One of them, Laurent Fabius, is now minister of finances.

Brought to you by the makers of napalm--The feds are working out a deal for the merger of Dow Chemical and Union Carbide. There is no way to estimate the number of people who have died from chemicals and chemical wastes. But we were impressed by the government's assurance that the merger would preserve the integrity of the industry.

Probably die soon anyway--Elderly patients waiting for care in the emergency and accident departments of England's National Health Service lay on gurneys as long as 25 hours. Meanwhile, Labor Party prime minister Anthony Blair said it would be too expensive to follow Scotland's example in providing special care for the elderly.

Talk about pigs--Smithfield Foods, the country's biggest hog processor--6 billion pounds a year--is the target of a suit by environmental groups. They charge Smithfield with deliberately fouling air, earth, and water in defiance of the law. The money saved enhances their ability to clobber small farm competitors. A top dog at Smithfield denied the charge, declaring the company's environmental practices were "state of the art."

If dead, dial '000'--With an asserted "enhancement" of other services, New York's Health Insurance Plan (HIP) discontinued its toll-free Nurse Advice Line. "For example," it advises, "in a medical emergency, members should dial 911."

Racist 'regrets'--The lower house of the Virginia legislature adopted a resolution voicing regret that an early 20th Century "eugenics" law led to 8,000 forced sterilizations. The law purportedly aimed at eliminating such "hereditary" offensives as crime, immorality and ignorance. The resolution was slated to go to the state Senate. The original draft of the resolution included an apology. This was stricken.

'Mad capitalist' disease--To prop up beef prices driven down by fear of "mad cow" disease, the French government is slaughtering up to 10,000 cattle a week. The dead cows are being frozen until enough incinerators can be built.

Not Bill Gates?--The pope is weighing naming St. Isidore of Seville, as patron saint of internet users and computer programmers.  
 
 
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