May top thieves freeze in hell—In the Denver, Colorado, area, 237,930 energy customers have been unable to pay their utilities and heating bills for this October. With winter, they’re staring at $170 a month bills from Xcel Energy. The Denver Post offers a lucid explanation: “The culprits: An April natural gas price hike, and the lackluster[!] economy.”

Ingenious, but not big-time—In Texas, la migra cops confiscated 750 pounds of Mexican bologna crossing the border. It was artfully arranged in the shape of a car seat in the cab of a pickup truck and covered with blankets.

P.S.—A Customs agent piously noted the health risk of running unrefrigerated meat across the border. We have no data, but we do wonder about the scope of the unsafe food and drugs banned in the U.S. and shipped to other countries.

Not very ‘ancient history’—TV journalist Hal Walker has died at 70. He was among the first Black TV newscasters, breaking the color ban at CBS in the 1960s. From there he went on to ABC.

Corporate crumbs—An $18 million New York duplex, owned by Tyco International, was used by recent chief exec Dennis Kozlowski when he was in town. He’s now on trial for larceny. The Tyco apartment is a bit startling—a dozen paintings featuring a Renoir and a Monet, an alleged $6,000 shower curtain in the maid’s room, a $15,000 umbrella stand, and a $2,200 wastebasket. Our question: How much sweat was needed to have that kind of cash—and a lot more—floating around? Specifically, the sweat of Tyco employees?

And next season?—“State’s data show that this season’s blazes were most destructive on record.”—Headline, Los Angeles Times.

Lacks attitude—“Younger workers don’t save enough,” a headline declared. In Chicago, Jeff Hinrich 28, figures he’ll be 40 before he could start saving for retirement. He’s paying off $30,000 in college debts and a $30,000 hospital bill. He observed, “It’s hard to save for retirement unless you’re Bill Gates.”

Not with the program?—“PUERTO RICO—A coalition of 40 unions, religious and community groups asked for Puerto Rican troops to be brought home from war duty in Iraq. The group said it would aid any troops returning home on leave who ‘decide in conscience not to return’ to Iraq. The coalition plans a gathering of soldiers’ relatives Dec. 7 to organize”—USA Today, November 28.  
 
 
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